favourite quotes

[Tiwaking!]

Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.

[Tiwaking!]

If you try to knock me you'll get mocked
I'll stir fry you in my wok
Your knees'll start shaking and your fingers pop
Like a pinch on the neck of Mr. Spock

[Tiwaking!]

I learned a valuable lesson back then: never take a reader's trust lightly.

[Tiwaking!]

tis no man, tis a remorseless eating machine

[Tiwaking!]

What is the riddle of steel?

[Tiwaking!]

Im doing what anybody with a brand new midget does, I'm taping him to a skateboard to see how far he can go

[Tiwaking!]

Although it is not true that all conservatives are stupid people, it is true that most stupid people are conservative.

[Tiwaking!]

The stupid will be punished

[Tiwaking!]

"The Internet is the first thing that humanity has built that humanity doesn't understand, the largest experiment in anarchy that we have ever had."

[Tiwaking!]

I don’t have any fucking nightmares, only fond memories and a few regrets about all the fuckers I didn’t get to stab or shoot to death

[Tiwaking!]

Afro Circus, Afro Circus!

[Tiwaking!]

She left behind an emptiness
A gap, a void, a trough
The world is quite a good deal less
Since Coral Browne fucked off

[Tiwaking!]

Pickle, please let me know when the talk-back mike is on so that Mr. Sensitives don'ts go's to's cry's babies house for vacation.

[Tiwaking!]

One dog barks at something, the rest bark at him.

[playerB]

Band of brother: Stop fraternising with the enemy - Perconte?
Community: Cool, Cool cool cool. - Abed
Pirates of the Caribean: what arrre you doing- Barbosa
Matrix: Not like this, not like this - Switch
Futurama: Great News Everybody - Prof. F.Farnsworth
Ironman: Humdrumvee - Tony stark
In Bruges: Alcove, is this the word - gun dealer

[Tiwaking!]

I've got the skills to impress
Im a computer genius
The words "Microsoft"
Dont apply to my penis

[Pyromanik]

But in Scaninavia they've all got Qt trolls.

[Tiwaking!]

Sometimes
People fight a war
Dont know what its for
BUSINESS!

[Tiwaking!]

Emos want to kill themselves and goths want to kill everyone else

[Tiwaking!]

Cant sleep, clown will eat me.

[Tiwaking!]

Five o'clock tea, that pernicious, unprincipled and stomach-ruining habit.

[Tiwaking!]

Lay me doon in the caul caul groon
 Whaur afore monie mair huv gaun
 Lay me doon in the caul caul groon
 Whaur afore monie mair huv gaun

[Tiwaking!]

"Angela's cleavage shocks TV fans"
I think it was having a woman reading the news they didn't like

[Tiwaking!]

I started the conversation with him in the following way: "Recently I have been working on a difficult problem, today I come here to do battle against that problem with you" We discussed every aspect of this problem. Then suddenly I understood where the key to this problem lay. Next day I came back to him again and said to him without even saying hello, "thank you. I've completely solved the problem

[Tiwaking!]

Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.